The Time when Yamamoto Give Up His Sword
by DnKS-giRLs
Summary: A somewhat 80S fanfic. On that Christmas party, Dino found the joy of innuendos, Sqalo found that he hated the thing called innuendos, and Yamamoto simply did not get the whole thing altogether.


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**Title**: The Time when Yamamoto Give Up His Sword to Play with Balls and Pop Squalo's Cherry

**Author**: DnKS – giRLs

**Rating**: PG13

**Character(s)/Pairing(s)**: Dino Cavallone, Yamamoto Takeshi, Superbia Squalo/can be seen as 80S

**Disclaimers**: The characters involved in this story do not belong to us and we hold no claim over them.

**Warning**: Heavy use of innuendo

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The Christmas party was Tsuna's idea, actually, though Dino could not say what could possibly be the reason behind it. Perhaps Tsuna thought that years after the battle of the ring, combined with the spirit of Christmas and alcohol, could diminish, or at least dampen, the hatred between the members of Vongola and Varia. Perhaps he was being optimistic. Perhaps he was tired of his underlings' half hidden attempt at picking fight with any of those members of Varia they could find. Perhaps he was trying to bridge a firmer alliance with the Varia—they were strong ally after all. Or perhaps he was simply being Tsuna, the naïve boy who thought that 'friendship' was the best concept ever.

Not that he thought that friendship was not great, Dino thought as he sipped his Manhattan, but the mafia's view of 'friendship' differed a lot from common people's conception of friendship. There was always a pair of quotation mark surrounding the word friendship if it were to be mentioned in the mafia world. And Tsuna, regardless of the fact that he was probably one of the strongest mafia bosses who still lived and breathed, seemed unable to see the distinction.

Dino frowned when a half drunken random guy walked past him. In the distance, he could hear some sounds which perhaps could pass as the sound of firecrackers, if he was being optimistic, or gunshots, if he was being realistic. He grimaced and discreetly edged his way further from the source of the sound, which somehow found him closer to a group of two people standing near the buffet table.

The two people in question turned their faces to his direction. He saw Yamamoto grinning at him. He saw Squalo glaring at him. He heard another loud exploding sound (not firecrackers, _definitely_ not firecrackers!) and he made his choice.

"Hello," he greeted. "Fancy another one joining your conversation?"

Dino was delighted to note that a combination of 'yes' and 'no' and 'boom' actually was quite pleasant to hear. He grinned and put his half empty glass to the table. The tablecloth had exquisite embroideries and laceworks lining the trim, he observed. He should ask where Tsuna got that; his mother would be very pleased to get a set of those for Christmas.

"So," he said to begin the conversation. "What are you two talking about?"

"Like hell we're talking!" Squalo said at the same time when Yamamoto said, "Oh, nothing," and of course in the background there was another sound of 'boom'.

Dino cleared his throat. He eyed the two people before him before he cleared his throat again.

"Yes, so…" he tried again. "You guys had any sparring done recently?"

That time, both Yamamoto and Squalo answered him with, "Huh?"

(To be fair, Yamamoto's 'huh' was accompanied with the slightly confused please-clarify-your-words look while Squalo's held the what-fucking-crap-are-you-bitching-about look)

"Well, it's been years since the battle of the ring," he explained before he could stop himself. Real smooth there, he thought when he saw Squalo narrowing his eyes at him. "I mean, I'm wondering if you two decided to continue your… uh, battle, with some friendly sparring or things…"

"And why," Squalo snapped harshly at him, "Do you fucking think that shit?"

"Um," he answered shortly. Then when Squalo began reaching for his sword, he continued. "You're both swordsmen!"

Oh, great, Dino thought grimly, it seemed the alcohol level in his blood was higher than what he initially thought. What an impressive answer. That, he thought, really showed how very good mafia leader he was.

Oh cool, he still had a bit of sarcasm in him, it seemed. Perhaps high alcohol level was not really a bad thing—he could never do sarcasm when he was sober. And good mafia leader needed sarcasm. Or perhaps, Dino rectified his thought, as Squalo's hand finally found the hilt of his long sword, what a good mafia leader (meaning him) really needed was a good pair of legs which could carry him as fast as possible from the imminent danger.

"What the fuck?" Squalo nearly screamed. "'Cuz we're two fucking swordsmen? Huh?! You asshole traded your brain for crap or what?!"

Perhaps it was the alcohol that addled his brain and messed up with his logic, but Dino honestly thought Squalo was asking him if they should be fucking because they were both swordsmen. The innuendo, though coarse, was enough to make him snort. Why did he not see it before, he thought, two swordsmen. Oh, Romario would be laughing his ass of if he told him about it, Dino was sure. Though when he observed Squalo's expression, Dino considered running away fast if he still wanted to live to tell Romario the tale.

"Nah… Squalo might be a swordsman, but lately I think I don't use my sword that often," Yamamoto added up and Dino gave up his intention to run to chuckle instead.

"That's because you're not… sparring with each other… so your long, hard swords are… rusty…" he said, trying so hard not to laugh.

Yamamoto blinked at him innocently, "I don't think my sword could be considered as long sword… Squalo's different, though, that's a real long sword. His is way longer than mine."

Dino snickered, "Oh, you would know…"

"Oi, wait there," Squalo's sharp voice cut through his snicker. Dino looked at him and found he was torn between laughing and feeling a bit terrified for Squalo's face was a perfect mixture of rage and embarrassment. While it was indeed a comical sight, the fact that he was the one who had somehow prompted that look on Squalo's face told Dino that he surely should take extra caution for at least the next few months. After all, Squalo was known for his vengeful nature.

But, Dino thought as he smiled mischievously, it was tomorrow's worry. He should not fret about it just yet.

"Yes?" he asked in a tone of voice that he reserved for use when he was little and asking his grandmamma for sweets. "I think Yamamoto should know, right, considering he has seen your sword in action and all?"

"You…" Squalo's face grew redder. "…perverted old pedophile, you're a sick fuck, Cavallone!"

"Oh, dear…" Dino said as he took his glass of half finished Manhattan from the table and shoved it onto Squalo's hands. "You look like burning… take the drink, Squalo, it can cool you down. Unless, of course, you want to remain _in heat_."

"You really look like you could use some drink, though," Yamamoto said. "Your face looks funny."

"Ah, yes, but tell me again about your earlier statement," Dino said to Yamamoto. "Not using your… sword that often lately?"

Yamamoto grinned, "Well, yes. Lately it's somewhat peaceful so I'm not really required to fight."

Seeing the expression on Yamamoto's face, Dino realized that Yamamoto simply did not catch the joy/embarrassment that he/Squalo were currently experiencing. He could not understand how someone could fail to see the heavy innuendo in their recent conversation. Though if he considered Yamamoto's personality, there was indeed a possibility… and the possibility was quite big, actually…

Suddenly he felt a teeny bit like some old sick fuck like how Squalo had described him as, even though he could not understand why.

"So, um…" he coughed discreetly and continued, trying (he swore by the Holy Trinity that he was really trying) to steer the conversation to some normal route. "What are you doing lately?"

"Hum? I'm back to baseball, I guess," Yamamoto answered. "It's fun and relaxing."

"Baseball, eh?" Dino said as he warily glanced to Squalo's direction.

"Yep, I love baseball and I think I'm more suitable at handling balls than handling sword, anyway," Yamamoto said as he grinned oh-so-innocently.

What followed that statement was a choking sound. Dino was sure he was the one who made the sound, but when he glanced sideway he found out that Squalo was the one to make the sound. And considering from his expression, it seemed the choking sound was due to some real life-threatening-wind-pipe-clogging-kind-of-incident as opposed to mere gesture expressing disbelief.

Yamamoto was quick to the rescue. While Dino was standing and watching and gaping and altogether being useless in any sense of the word, Yamamoto had already run to Squalo's side and did something that suspiciously looked like he was trying to break Squalo's spine. But, judging from how Squalo had ceased making sound like a strangled fish—if there was ever one, it seemed Yamamoto had done his job splendidly.

The commotion they made attracted several people to gather around them. He could spot Tsuna, his expression was curious. He could see that Lussuria guy with his sparkling feather boa. He could see Gokudera, and what looked like Ryohei, and it seemed even Xanxus was glancing to their direction.

He could not see Kyoya, though. Pity.

"What's… going on here?" Tsuna asked carefully.

"Oh… nothing…" he tried to assure Tsuna. "We're just talking, and…"

"Get your fucking hands away from me, you bastard!"

Squalo's somewhat high-pitched yell drew his attention to him. As a matter of fact, all of the people who gathered there found their gazes being drawn to Squalo. And so it was unavoidable that all the people gathered there found themselves being treated to a peculiar sight of Squalo, face as red as beet, being embraced from behind by an oblivious looking Yamamoto.

There might not be any preliminary intelligence test to enter the mafia world—a fact that Dino always used to justify the presence of so many idiots he encountered during his time. But when they see such a scene like the one unfolding before their eyes, surely they could put two and two together and came up with a single collective gasp of embarrassment (in Tsuna's case) or envy (in Lussuria's case).

And for once, it seemed Yamamoto understood the meaning behind the stare being thrown at his direction from the people around him. Hastily he released his hold around Squalo's midsection and laughed sheepishly.

"It's not… uh… I was just helping Squalo with his cherry…"

Dino choked. Lussuria giggled. Squalo's face just went impossibly redder. Tsuna's face seemed to be burning with embarrassment. But amidst all those, Yamamoto's face remained unfazed.

Dino could not decide whether he should envy him or pity him.

"I mean, he got choked so I helped him with it," Yamamoto explained.

Lussuria gave him his best wink-wink-nudge-nudge smile, "Help him you say…?"

"With the cherry," Yamamoto grinned. "I popped it out."

That time Dino simply gave up. He laughed out loud, uncaring of the fact that Squalo looked like he was so going to kill him—after he killed Yamamoto first. He was not the only one laughing, though, so perhaps Squalo would find his hands full for the next few days trying to deliver his revenge. But it was too much, more than enough for him to simply disregard the idea of some angry swordsman strangling him in favor of laughing his ass off at the face said swordsman made at that moment.

He should thank Tsuna later, Dino thought in between his laughter. His Christmas party was in every bit wonderful!

**End**

(A/N: this might be the fic with the longest title that we have ever written. That should count for something. Yes, so, thank you for reading this fic until the end. We hope you had a good reading time. Please let us know your comment on this fic by dropping us some review, thank you.)


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